Various outfits party series
by Foxgoddess1
Summary: sorry rav, but i deserve to post this too. this story includes characters in hilarious situations and variou outfits, leather pants, tutus and the list goes on. we're so twisted.
1. The Leather Pants Party

A/N: Erm, we wrote this during a very boring history class...it's kind of insane. I think we love the HP characters too much! (Not to mention our leather fetish...) Oh, and we don't hate Snape! We just thought he'd look better in the attire we chose as opposed to leather. If this gets lots of good reviews we may write a sequel, which will most likely be better than this one cuz we wrote it in an hour. The beginning sucks, but it gets better, I promise! There's lots of plot holes, but stories like this aren't supposed to make sense anyway.   
Disclaimer: All characters belong to JK. The idea belongs to Fox and I. Kanga belongs to herself (so she says...). Raven's basement belongs to Raven (me!). Vex and Island Stingers are registered trademarks of whoever they belong to. Jumanji belongs to whoever made up that movie. And all the Simpsons quotes we ripped off belong to the writers of the Simpsons (geniuses *sniff*).  
The Leather Pants Party  
By: Fox_goddess and RavenWillow  
[It's a boring afternoon. Fox and Raven are hanging out, bored as ever.]  
Fox: I'm bored.  
Raven: Yes, we've already established that.  
F: So what should we do?  
R: I know! Let's have a leather pants party!  
F: OK!  
R: Who should we bring in first?  
F: Let's start with...Harry!  
*poof*  
Harry: Uh...hi?  
F: Hi Harry! Want an Island Stinger or a Vex?  
Harry: A what?  
R: Never mind...  
F: Now Raven, how shall we dress Harry? [She snaps her fingers and Harry lacks clothing.]  
Harry: Ack!  
R [wiping the drool away]: OK...maybe we should give him some clothes. *snap*  
[Harry appears wearing a pink tutu.]  
Harry: This is even worse! Help!  
R: Oops, sorry. That's Snape's wardrobe. *snap*  
[Harry appears in black leather pants and a black shirt.]  
F: Yay! Leather party! We need more people, though. Let's get Draco in here!  
*poof* [Draco drops out of the sky.]  
Draco: Ow...where the hell am I?  
R: Welcome to the Leather Pants Party! Oops, he's lacking leather. QUICK, I NEED 500CCs OF LEATHER, STAT!" *snap*  
[Draco appears in brown snakeskin pants and a white shirt, half unbuttoned.]  
Draco: WHAT THE HELL AM I WEARING?!  
R: It's Armani, I thought you'd like it...Fox, dear, close your mouth, you're getting drool everywhere.  
Harry: This is too kinky for my liking. Can I go home now?  
F: Harry, no! Hey Draco, wanna drink? [waves a Vex in his face] You know you want it.  
[Draco grabs the drink greedily and sits on a couch, grumbling.]  
R: OK, this party's dead. Let's bring in...  
*poof*  
Harry: The Weasley twins?  
Fred & George: Um, Harry, what's with the pants? And who are these girls?  
F: Ooh, twins! Thanks, Raven! [tackles the twins] Let's make you match!  
*snap*  
Draco: Fred is sporting a pair of the traditional black leather pants with a tight orange tank top, then comes George with a yellow shirt and pants to match his brother.  
R: Draco, I question your sexual preference.  
Draco: So does everyone else...HEY!  
[Raven and Fox snigger.]  
Draco: Well, can you guys at least bring in a girl? All this leather is making me uncomfortable...  
R: I s'pose...Hmmm...  
*poof*  
Raven and Fox's very confused friend Kanga: Uh, Fox? Raven? What's going on?  
R: We bring you Draco!  
F: Desperate!  
R: And in leather!  
[Kanga squeals and tackles Draco, dragging him off.]  
F: Happy now?  
[Harry staggers out from behind the bar, and empty bottle of vodka in hand.]  
Harry: I love you guys, all of you!  
F: Uh oh, Harry's gotten into the hard liquor. That's mine!  
[Fox tackles Harry and beats him.]  
R: Well, this is getting better, but we're still missing something...  
Fred [mumbling]: Yeah, and authority figure...  
R: Great idea! Thanks!  
George: I don't like the sound of that.  
*poof* [Remus and Sirius appear. Raven squeals with delight.]  
Remus: Um, ok...I'm somewhere where I don't know where I am, and I am in leather pants...  
Sirius: Go with it, man! [Grabs a Vex from Fox.]  
F [leaving Harry passed out by the bar]: Now the party is complete! [Fox collapses on a couch with George & Fred.] Well...except for one thing.  
*poof* [Snape appears in a pink tutu.]  
F [giggling]: Dance, you greasy-haired git! [She threatens him with her wand.]  
Snape: Ack! Help! [begins to prance.]  
R: Complete? My dear Fox, no Leather Pants Party would be complete without...  
*poof*  
R: Ron! [Ron looks around, confused at his new leather attire.]  
F: Ron's mine! I own the Weasley boys!  
Ron [backing away from Fox slowly]: Where are we, anyway?  
R: The best place to go for a drunken party!  
F: Raven's basement!  
*snap* [Booze, beanbag chairs, a fog machine and swanky music appear.]  
Ron: Al right!  
F: Mmm, Vex, my favourite! Besides the Weasleys, of course.  
Fred and George: Hey, we're lacking attention!  
F [in a sing-song voice]: I'm coming!  
Harry [swaying drunkenly]: Come one everybody! Everybody get naked! Come on, don't be shy, it's going to be great!  
R: OK! We have everyone in leather, Snape in a tutu and Harry's faced - what now?  
Sirius [grabbing another drink and ripping off his shirt]: PAR-TAY! [He chugs his drink and passes out on the floor.]  
Ron: Ri-i-i-ght....  
Remus [to no one in particular]: These pants are chafing me...   
F: Hey Remus, if those pants are chafing you, why not take them off?  
[Remus cowers.]  
Fred: Hey Fox, what about us?  
F: Oh yeah! [Prances off to her corner with the Weasleys.]  
R: What corner? This room is circular...  
Remus [turning to Raven]: Well, seeing as how you're the only sane one here, what's say you get rid of everyone and I'll show you *CENSOR*  
F: Ew, that was the dirtiest pickup line ever!  
Remus: I must warn you, I get kind of weird once a month.  
R: That's al right, so does every girl.  
[Draco emerges, buttoning up his shirt. Looks around at Harry hanging off a chandelier, Sirius passed out on the floor, Snape in his tutu, and all the other goings-on.]  
Draco: Did I miss something?  
R: Not much.  
Draco [shrugging]: Well, as long as everyone's here, let's just party!  
Ron: Uh oh, all the booze is gone...  
Harry: I know how to solve this one! JUMANJI! [long pause] It didn't work...  
[Everyone stares at the empty bar. Snape emerges from a back room, having changed out of his tutu. He is now also in leather pants.]  
Snape: What's going on?  
Fred [pointing at the empty bar]: All the booze is gone.  
Snape: WHAT? But liquor is the sustenance of life!  
[Everyone screams in terror at the prospect of a booze-less party.]  
R: This fanfic is over...  
*poof* [Almost everyone goes back to where they came from.]  
F [shrugs]: It was fun while it lasted.  
R: Yeah...wanna go watch some Heath Ledger movies and get drunk?  
F: Sure.  
[Fox and Raven exit.]  
Harry [still hanging from the chandelier]: Hello? Mrs. Pummelhorse? I'd like to get down now...  
***  
Fin  
  



	2. The Pink Tutu Party

A/N: Erm, should we bother with another warning? Well, if you've read The Leather Pants Party (and we recommend you do, in order for this one to make sense) you'll understand the story better. This sequel is strongly influenced by Monty Python, especially Monty Python and the Holy Grail. The story still makes sense if you haven't seen the movie, but it would help if you're familiar with it...Oh yeah, the last line in the Leather Pants Party about Mrs. Pummelhorse was from the Simpsons. If you remember that episode, good for you! That quote is hilarious. Well, enjoy!  
Disclaimer: Anything that isn't ours, isn't ours.  
The Pink Tutu Party   
By Fox_goddess and RavenWillow  
[It's another wonderful history class for Raven and Fox.]  
Raven: We need to do something!  
Fox: Always! Let's have another party!  
R: Yeah, but I'm getting kind of sick of leather pants...  
F: How about pink tutus? Those are always amusing. Well, let's get some tutu action here!  
*poof!* [Snape appears in his pink tutu.]  
Snape: Oh no, not you again! [Looks down] AAAH!  
F: That's right! But you won't be alone today. Welcome the Weasley Brothers!  
*poof!*  
Ron: You! Why God, why?!  
The Twins: Pink tutus...[they shrug] Oh well.  
Charlie: Well, this is new...  
Bill: Hey, what happened to my leather pants?  
Percy [sobbing]: I'm ruined! My robes! My beautiful robes!  
F: Oh, quiet you! Try something different!  
R: Now, let's bring back the life of the party! *poof!* Harry! We've missed you.  
Harry: YOU! You left me hanging from a chandelier for 3 hours! And now you put me in a tutu? I hate you!  
F: Harry dear, you were the one who drank all that vodka.  
Harry: Oh yeah...  
***pointless flashback scene***  
Hey, vodka! ... [SCENE MISSING] ... I love you guys, everyone! ... [SCENE MISSING]  
***end pointless flashback scene***  
Harry: I see.  
F: Hey Harry, want some vodka? Hmm?  
Harry: Ack, no! [starts twitching convulsively]  
R [pouting]: Fine. We'll just bring in the other drunk!  
*poof!*  
Sirius: Hey, you girls again! Hey, booze! HEY! A tutu! [Grabs a drink]  
R [with an evil grin]: Excellent...  
Percy [prancing by, singing]: I feel pretty, oh so pretty...  
F & R: Ri-i-i-ight...  
Charlie: Can I have my normal clothes back?  
R: No! This is a Pink Tutu Party, and in your tutu you shall stay.  
Ron: So how come you two aren't in tutus?  
R [threatening look]: Quiet, you...  
F: We refrain from wearing the party attire so as not to scare the bigeezes out of you all.  
Fred and George: It can't be that bad...can it?  
F: If you so wish... *snap*  
All: AAH! THE HORROR!  
*snap*  
F: Better? I thought so.  
Snape: All these Gryffindors...[shudders]  
R [sighs]: Oh, FINE!  
*poof!*  
Draco: Ugh, pink is so not my colour.  
Sirius [swaying drunkenly]: Lookit that kid! He's in a tutu!  
Harry [angrily]: So are all of us!  
Sirius: Oh yeah...[grabs another bottle of vodka]  
F: We need more people! This party needs some more sex-crazed females to really get going. Muahaha!  
*poof!*  
[Enter Raven & Fox's friends Tinker & Dragon's Angel]  
DA: DRACO! Come on, let's get you out of that tutu [mischievous grin].  
Draco: Sure! [Realizes what DA meant] Oh my...  
Tinker: Well, what about me?  
F: Easily remedied. Tinker, I give you your evil guy!  
*poof* [Enter Tom Riddle]  
Tom [pointing at his tutu]: OK, who's responsible for this?  
Draco [gasping for air]: Help me!  
R: Well, this is going nowhere...  
F: I agree. Pink tutus aren't as entertaining as I thought they would be.  
R: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?  
[Evil grins from Raven and Fox]  
*snap* [A swarm of rabid ferrets appears]  
All: AAAH!  
[Chaos ensues]  
Sirius: Woah, ferrets! Woah, beer! Woah, the floor!  
Harry [singing longingly]: When I was 17, I drank some very good beer. I drank some very good beer I purchased with a fake ID. My name was Brian McGee. I stayed up listening to Queen. When I was 17...  
Ron: Harry, you're only 15.  
Harry: Uh, yes...yes, of course [adjusts his tie and looks around with shifty eyes]  
F: Where did you get that tie?  
R: Bill, there's a rabid ferret on your butt.  
Bill [looks down]: I see.  
F: It's so sad how a party can be torn apart by something as simple as rabid ferrets.  
Bill: I think I need to go to the hospital...  
F: No you don't.  
[Bill collapses on the floor]  
F: Oh well. [shrugs] PAR-TAY ON DUDES!  
Sirius: Wait a minute, that's my line.  
F: Tough shit!  
R [steps in front of everyone and speaks to the wall]: And now for something completely different.  
Harry: Hu?  
***pointless movie ripoff section***  
Tom Riddle: You must learn that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb.  
Ron: I am a Shrubber. They call me Roger the Shrubber.  
Charlie [singing]: Always look on the bright side of life...always look on the lighter side of life...  
George: They've gone to plaid!  
Fred: I always have coffee when I watch radar, you know that! Everybody knows that!  
Harry: You've got two empty halves of coconuts and you're banging them together!  
Sirius: She's a witch! She turned me into a newt! [he receives several strange looks] ...I got better...  
Percy: What...is the air speed velocity of an unlaiden swallow?  
R: I think we need to end this...  
***end***  
R: Well...that was interesting.  
F [looking at Bill]: Maybe we should do something about him. [Pokes Bill with her wand. He doesn't move.]  
[Snape enters with a wheelbarrow, banging a wooden spoon on a pot.]  
Snape: Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead!  
R: And the solution presents itself.  
[Fox hoists Bill over her shoulder]  
R: Here you are.  
Bill [faintly]: I'm not dead.  
Snape: What?  
R: Nothing. Here you go. [Fox starts to put him on the cart]  
Bill: I'm not dead.  
Snape: He says he's not dead.  
F: Yes, he is.   
Bill: I'm not!   
Snape: He isn't.   
R: Well, he will be soon, he's very ill.   
Bill: I'm getting better!   
R: No, you're not - you'll be stone dead in a moment.   
Snape: Oh, I can't take him like that - it's against regulations.   
Bill: I don't want to go in the cart!   
F: Oh, don't be such a baby.   
Snape: I can't take him...   
Bill: I feel fine!  
F: Oh, do us a favour...   
Snape: I can't.   
R: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won't be long.   
Bill: I think I'll go for a walk.   
F: You're not fooling anyone y'know. Look, isn't there something you can do?  
Bill: I feel happy! I feel happ -   
[Snape hits Bill over the head with his pot.]  
R: Thanks!  
[Fox puts Bill on the cart and Snape rolls away.]  
Sirius: Woah...I can see the music!  
R [snatching the bottle away]: That's enough for you!  
F [looking around]: Uh oh...  
[The rabid ferrets are wreaking total havoc. Bits of pink tulle are flying rampant.]  
F: Well, I suppose we should put a stop to this.  
Fred: You're sending us back?  
George: But, we like it here!  
Ron: Minus the rabid ferrets.  
Draco: And the crazy girls...  
Charlie: The food's good.  
Percy: And the clothing's great!  
Sirius [stumbling around, singing]: La la la la la Macarena. HEY Macarena!  
F: Raven, why do our parties always turn out this way?  
R: I guess we'll never know  
F: Well, we'll see you at the next party.  
*poof!*  
F: So what now?  
R: I don't know...a Naked Party?  
F: Sounds good to me. Let's go stock up on some booze first.  
R: Good idea.  
[They exit]  
Harry: Aw damn, why does this always happen? Well, I guess I'll just wait until they come back... Oh, hello Mr Ferret, how are - AAAH!  
***  
Fin   
Raven's A/N: Oh God, those Monty Python rip-offs were horrible, weren't they? Yes, this story lacks originality, but I thought all those scenes and lines just fit well...I won't do it so badly the next time, I promise. I watch too much TV...Damn writers and their hilarious plots...*grumbles* I think I'll go eat some prunes...  
  



End file.
